Got an update from the cps.  They are discussing whether to press charges or not.  But it is strongly hinted that my attacker may only get an "adult caution".  . They have full CCTV footage of me, Unarmed, not attacking back or retaliating while the beats me around the head and the kidneys with a metal weapon in two separate flurries of attacks.  . If it does not go to court, then people will wrongly assume that his warped version of events is totally true, They will wrongly assume that he is sone sort of "anti hero" to be looked up to that I tried to victimise somehow. If it does not go to court he will paint himself as some kind of victim and me as the villain. - ...and people will believe the charming, attractive, successful DJ guy, not the ugly socialy awkward skint one, on benefits, suffeing from regular suicidal depression bouts. . If it does not go to court. If the whole story is not put on public record and left to only rumour and hearsay? Then what is the p...

.  WHATS THE FRIG’N BIG DEAL!   I have had a crap load of silly fuss. Including one physical attack over a spoof comedy video. Because I am showing a bit O’ skin! A) The amount of skin is NOT really any more than you would see at a swimming pool…   B) Prince, 1988 Lovesexy album (among other male artist) have shown just as much skin in posters and album cover that have been openly shown in family shopping centres all over the world.   C) My parody video is an attempt at comedy, And is clearly hash tagged #Poetry #Comedy #Humour #Cringe #sexisim #tits  I DO NOT see myself as “Sexy” This is NOT some misplaced attempt to seduce anyone. I see myself and a silly flabby ugly bloke who accepts that he looks like human walking garbage pile, and who is shrugging his shoulders and just leaning into it for comic effect. You are supposed to LAUGH at my body, not be offended by it!   I do not understand you “normal people”, you ...

The quality of streaming and online entertainment is so high and so reasonably priced for all nowadays! Some of the best stuff is even FREE! For only example, Only yesterday I watched a documentary about the fall of the Roman Empire, And how they used cheap mass entertainment to distract the masses from the real problems that the authorities could not solve! What a brilliant documentary! It really took my mind off the problems of this modern world for a while! Truly we are living in a golden age of entertainment!

. THIS DESCRIBES ME! . “...what real courage is ... It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do.” . Harper Lee's "To Kill a Mockingbird" (1960) .

. WHY MEN ARE STUPID: AN EXAMPLE: . I do not think certain activities are a good idea for a person in badly damaged condition: The pain would NOT be worth it! A smart person would just use common sense, and work on healing. . Been there and done that! - Shortly after a beating I took in my early 20s, A pretty lass visited me to 'comfort me' ! It was NOT worth the pain: Instant regret as all the feel-good stuff packed up and pissed off and the torture flooded in to replace it! - I instantly swore NEVER AGAIN!... ... ... Then proceeded to make the same mistake another 4 times that night and each time said "Never again" afterwards! . - Seriously! There are mice in electrified test Mazes that are less stupid and who learn quicker than a man is or does! . ONLY A MAN WOULD BE THAT STUPID! A woman would never be that kind of special idiot! .

. I keep mentality preparing myself for isolation and to accept people's rejection of me - So I can always quietly walk away with calm dignity, without undue fuss. I keep expecting the social guillotine in every social circle I enter. I see it as an eventual inevitability. - So, I can never really relax. Not really. If I relax - even for a moment - Then, That is when it will happen! - Being braced and prepared for it all the time - protects me. It lessens the pain of the inevitable expulsion that WILL Always eventually happen! . I will always, and forever be 'homesick'. I will never get to feel that I have 'finally come home' . . . Saying with a shrug,  "It is - what it is",  Is a bit more polite and socially acceptable than screaming in pain. .

. Its own punishment. By Ross e F Lombardi. . Stay distracted. With the danger and the rage. And by my pit of fear I don't mind being so disposable. . I feel no dread of danger. It only feels dreadful When I remember What I am . Keep distracted By treats and trinkets From being such a worthless man. I can live with being so expendable. . It's not painful to pay the bills. It's only Painful When I remember Where I am. . Be distracted With a book and reading. From being this total loser. I can live with the mad crazy thoughts. . It doesn't hurt me when I read. It only hurts, When I remember Who I am. .

. MY feelings about g0D . He is both a 'brutal son of a bitch' and a 'feckless thug' and has a sick sense of humour. I do believe god. I have dared judge god and found him GUILTY! I do hate god. He is just as evil as sAtan - but with a better PR department! .

. Men ARE crap! It is true... ...We are all very shit!  - I am so glad that my son is straight and that my daughter is a lesbian!  - As it vastly reduces the chance of either of them becoming a victim of domestic violence! . If the world population of women outnumbered men by 10 times or more. We would have world peace. Us men are crap! . I spent most days trying to remind myself how ridiculous it is for me to hate men, - when I am one. It's hard to explain how experiencing straight men be monsters to women from an early age can make you hate yourself as a straight man. Part of me will always be that terrified toddler who could not understand. It means as you grow and mature into a straight man yourself, You constantly terrify yourself with your own natural healthy and normal feelings. As all you can see instead are the monsters from your nightmares. . Short version. A child seeing bad shit will fuck them up for life. .

. People like horror to help escape their hum-drum lives. . Well, worldwide, if Project 2025 becomes a real thing in the USA, we will all get all the horror, far more horror than we want, to escape our hum-drum lives than we can possibly imagine. . Escaping our hum-drum lives will no longer be a problem - as KEEPING our hum-drum lives will become a far more pressing issue! . .

 . I ADMIT IT!  I DO FIND THE SITE OF TWO MEN KISSING GROSS!  BUT! I am WRONG for feeling that way! The Only problem is ME! - Not them!  No 'ifs', No 'But's', NO EXCUSES! - it IS MY problem - NOT theirs! . I AM working on being better than that! And I WILL get there in the end!  . My current main inspiration? (among many)  The TV Series 'Modern Family' and the character 'Jay Pritchett' played by Ed O'Neill . It would be nice to say a load of lies and pretend so I can fit in. Or make up bullshit "Excuses" using my age, background or upbringing.  But I feel doing that lacks courage.  And is disrespectful to all rights activists who have sacrificed so much to get us to where we are now. So, I will openly admit this gross personal character flaw - and Work on it - and hopefully, my honesty will help others do the same. . I owe this to those I harmed and vilified as the gross homophones that I was in my late teens. I have a karmic debt to ...

. The difference between "Excuses" and "Reasons" . "Excuses" are used to harm others. . "Reasons" are why people should not harm others. . There is always a reason to not harm someone AND There will always be an excuse to harm someone . . If you RE ALLY  want to be a rebel Then refuse to pick up a sword The kings HATE THAT shit! .

. Consenting woman at an orgy?  Vs  A Man who "Legally" kills 10 people for a flag? . Consenting woman at an orgy? Sleeps with 10 people at once? Everyone has fun? Makes some memories? SHE IS THE VILLIAN!? ? Man "Legally" kills 10 people for a flag? - a rag on a stick? 10 whole families lives are devastated and they have funerals. Pain that lasts a lifetime? Destroying love, hope and compassion? HE IS A HERO!? ? FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS ARE FUCKING AS WEIRD AS ALL FUCK!! . Personally? Out of the two? I'd respect the person who has NOT killed more! Any whore male or female is worth 100 killers who are just some government's murder bitch! ! I know who I'd rather marry! Hint? It is the fun one, NOT the one out of the two, whose Soul smells of tears, pain and blood! ! So many people think there is pride and honour in harming others Over a party enjoying life and harming no one. Most of the world seems to think this shit! AND YET? I AM SEEN AS THE WEIRDO!? FFS! ...

. Review: My recent beating with a length of metal: . Good multiple kidney thrusts strikes. Plenty of well-targeted speed there! No visible bruising on the outside but still left me needing to pee more often with more discomfort. Not many people are skilled enough to do that without visible bruises. And this alone would have gained a score of 8 or maybe even 9 out of 10. However, this performance was let down by sloppy overhead arm work. With more focus and less fury, I should have been on the floor after less than three blows, . But his fury caused a lack of concentration and wasted energy leaving me still standing. - a very base amateur mistake, that is surprising in someone so obviously experienced in these matters. So, unfortunately, despite his enthusiasm, I do have to deduct points for that. Leaving my attacker with a more pitiful score of only 5 out of 10. . But he tried hard so I'll throw him an extra point for effort. . He just needs to remember to turn more of his hot ra...

. 11 Reasons why I am  'a catch' . 1. REAL I am loyal and looking for something real... ...Not just 'companionship' or a ONS. If it's not love, then it ain't worth it. It is better to be with no one - than the wrong one. So, I don't ask absolutely everyone out in all directions. So if we are dating you know that you are special to me! - not just a mere 'gap filler'. . 2. PHYSICAL INVESTMENT. Although still flabby, I am far less flabby than I used to be. I have gone from a 50"" waist and walking with a stick to 38"" and dancing lots. I will get even thinner and less fabby as time goes on. I am an investment worth taking as my physical value is very likely to go up! . 3 CONSISTENCY Even though I am self-improving - That does not mean you not already perfect to me. If we are dating then I must already like you a lot, just as you are! . 4 SUPPORTIVE ...BUT! Despite on 3 above. If you DO want to change anything about yourself. Then I ...

. Ok, I admit it... By Ross e f Lombardi. . Ok, I admit It. I admit that I am struggling a little bit. I admit I am bruising my own soul a little bit. I admit that I am flirting with the void a little bit  . Ok, I can see it. I can see the value in numbness. I can understand a longing for this nightmare to stop. I can feel the seduction of 'self-ending'.  . Ok. I admit that I Do want it. I DO want to quit. I DO want to end. I DO want the comfortable cloth of forever nothingness. . Ok, I'll try it. Try Just a little. Try, To walk, Just a little bit. Try, To notice random street strangers in their lives. Just a tiny bit. Try, To hold on just a bit longer, Just a bit. . I can't keep doing this forever. Forever is too large, Too big, Too impossible to do. . Ok, I admit that I can't do forever. No one could! No one is that strong! In the face of this sickness. It cannot be done! Definitely not a weak shity wuss like me! . But maybe I can go down swinging? But maybe I can...

"Some days..." By Ross E F Lombardi . Some days, there is no moral crusade or political agenda. . Some days, you want to do an act of terrorism for no reason at all! . Some days, you feel so overwhelmed and overfilled with pain that you just want to release the pressure... ...to squirt that shit over everyone... ...like toxic - hot - viper - poison - hate cum - over the whore worlds back. . Some days, you want to kill a random stranger... ...Somone deeply loved by many... ...just to make their family mourn their loss. ...And fill their community with doubt and fear. . Some days, NOT all days, just some. - Only some. You DO want to set the world on fire, Or spread a plague, Or strap a bomb to your chest, Or carry a weapon. . Some days, . Sometimes, . It is Very hard to find any humanity within. To Not rage - and scream - and torture - and harm - and kill. . Some days of my mental illnesses Are much harder than others . Much - much -harder! . T...

. HARDER! . I used to have a 50"" waste and need to walk with a stick. I now have a 38"" waste and dance a lot for hours. It took a lot of effort and will to do that. losing weight IS extremely difficult! . And so far... I have kept the weight off! . BUT I AM TELLING YOU ALL THIS,  RIGHT NOW!! . Losing 10 lbs in weight, and keeping it off for years, is piss easy ... ...compared to trying to lose a single ounce of Self Loathing, and keeping it gone for a single hour!!! . .

? Did you know this? https://www3.nhk.or.jp/nhkworld/en/news/20241026_17/ Well, You Do Now...! I 'Called It'!  This reminds me of how World War One started.  A relative minor - (minor that is compared to a world war, obviously) - conflict sucking in all the allies from both sides. It was inevitable.  If it were not the Ukrainian war it would have just been a different one instead.  The real reason is the unavoidable environmental collapse and unsustainability of world human consumption of natural resources. .  When "good people" get desperate.  Then bad things happen.  . In short  ...I saw something like this coming ages ago.  I am not surprised. No psychic powers are needed.  Just a knowledge of history.  An understanding of human nature.  And being able to spot the patterns. (I have a weird brain)

I know we " need" rules  but on a purely personal note:  The very fact that "rules" exist makes my skin itch and I instinctively want to break them or burn something...  I am not looking for anyone to agree with me,  I do know it sounds nuts.  I am only giving an honest reaction, that's all, Just saying. - Nothing more...

. For ANYONE who needs to know - This is an ANTI-violence poem! Read it till the VERY END! - Not just halfway through . (WARNING! Emotional Trigger Warning - Extra Dark poem) . "Somedays..." By Ross E F Lombardi . Somedays there is no moral crusade or political agenda. . Somedays you want to do an act of terrorism for no reason at all! . Somedays you feel so overwhelmed and overfilled with pain that you just want to release the pressure... ...to squirt that shit over everyone... ...like toxic - hot - viper - poison - hate cum - over the whore worlds back. . Somedays you want to kill a random stranger... ...Somone deeply loved by many... ...just to make their family mourn their loss. ...And fill their community with doubt and fear. . Somedays, NOT all days, just some. - Only some. You DO want to set the world on fire, Or spread a plague, Or strap a bomb to your chest, Or carry a weapon. . Somedays, . Sometimes, . It is Very hard to find any humanity within. To Not rage - and s...

- I created a risqué poetry performance thing on TikTok (it is a comedy poem where I show a bit of skin - but NO privates) and shared it everywhere. And now apparently one of the people I spammed thinks I specifically targeted her. Which makes me feel a little insulted. So, that MIGHT cause me some hassle. She thinks I sent it to just her, and Apparently, both her mum and her boyfriend want to hit me ... Blah ... Blah ... Blah.... I barely care. ... . Yeh know what!? I sent that Vid EVERYWHERE! The only thing I am actually guilty of, Is treating her exactly the same as everyone else in the entire world! - Regardless of their age, sexuality OR gender! . https://youtu.be/Iol6UMpEo-s?si=QoOKtsPDXAT3JUs5 . Get ’em out Lass! - For all of us to see! By Ross E F Lombardi . I love a big pair on a lass, Not fake, Firm and real. I love huge ones on a woman. I love how they feel. . I love a couple of big-uns’ Large, up front and seen. I like it when they are So, obvious and blatant. That som...

. Get ’em out Lass! - For all of us to see! By Ross E F Lombardi . I love a big pair on a lass, Not fake, Firm and real. I love huge ones on a woman. I love how they feel. . I love a couple of big-uns’ Large, up front and seen. I like it when they are So, obvious and blatant. That some call them obscene! . I want to see them all the time, I like how they look on her. I love how they make my heart flip  And my musky man penis stir! . If you are thinking TITS - Then you are wrong! A Large Handful of Courage  - Next to a Huge Willpower mound. You don’t get much of That Anymore, -   To the modern UK pound! . #Poetry #Comedy #Humour #Cringe #sexisim #tits  .

. So, Sorry! I do apologize! I would absolutely love to stay on social media all day and get angry at the world and poison my mind and soul to do my fair part to increase page engagement and boost Ad revenue for mega-rich people. I really would! - Honest! But unfortunately, I Do have to go now! Because. apparently, "A settlement needs my help" . #Fallout4Gameplay #fallout4memes #Fallout76 #falloutnewvegas #fallout4 #fallout4mods .

. Random person - to me:  "I would not piss on you if you were on fire!" . My honest reply with a shrug: "You have good taste!" "I would not go out of my way to save 'me' either!" .

. So, my head observes, an internal scream Has larger screams that in them also howl; And these have even larger still inside them to cry “No!” And so proceed as 'Esse intus aeternum in inferno'. . Warped and corrupted by Rat Lombot from the famous flea poem by - Jonathan Swift: Poetry, a Rhapsody .

. Irony: A Definition: When I hate god. But I also, at the same time, Live my life much so closer, to those very same religious values and self-disciplines, Than any church going person I ever yet met... Maybe the godslaves should preach and prey far less and try a bit harder to live by example a bit more instead! . And I do it Without a endless golden lake of spiritual strength to tap into on a whim! I have to scrape my moral will from the bottom of my own limited mere mortal barrel! . Yet I'll get sent to hell, Because I won't bend a knee to a god who is a spoilt petulant brat. While his slaves get to waft into heaven because they lick his rusty balls and call it ice-cream! g0d? Fuck that dude! I choose to burn instead! . If you are doing good to see heaven. Then you are doing good for the wrong reason! You are just taking a bribe! . If you are doing good to avoid hell. Then you are doing it for the wrong reason  You are just cowering to intimidation. . Going good should be a...

. To summarise: My life so far: . My ex-wife of 30 years "Freindzoned" me. She said, "We don't need to love eachother," "We can just have the companionship" . It is hard to accurately articulate that sort of pain. We are now divorced. . I refuse to talk to her or see her. . I was easily replaced. She is now happy with a new man. . My heart is shattered and I may never love again. . I hate her - As Hating her is the only way I can survive. Because I can not take feeling any more tears. I am simply not strong enough to take any more tears! . She gets to be happy. I do not. Nuff said. .

. Follow a leader against their enemy?  NO! DOUBLE NO! TRIPPLE NO! With ice cream and a cherry on top!  . - Better to be a murder victim of the second person - Than be a mere following bitch of the first person: - I'd do almost anything to avoid following or having to bow to anyone! . Worship any god? - I'd rather go to hell! . Show loyalty to a crown? -I would rather be hung, drawn and quartered alive in front of a cheering crowd, on Traitors' Hill! . Fight for a flag? Stick that 'bloody rag on a stick' up your arse! I am not going to kill and die just to make rich wankers richer! . Know my place? HA! Screw that shit! I will squat and poop on Their lawn! . I would rather die defiant with eyes full of rage and dissent in a shit-filled gutter...! ...Instead of being someone else's pawn in their game in a golden cage! . The following of something means being owned by that same thing! . - One exception! Only One! Just One...! . If I am ever lucky enough to fall in ...

. One of my kids left some sweets when they visited. I thought outloud, "Damnit!" "I'm trying to eat healthy.," "I don't want that sugar crap in my house!" . Then I corrected myself, . "I meant, dammit" "I am trying to eat healthy," "I don't want that sugar crap..." "...In this 'Rented Flat' that I am living in!" . Then a wave of sad chilly fog settled over my soul... I am over 50 and fallen from off the housing ladder, I will Now be stuck renting for the rest of my life... . I will Never be able to accurately ever say,  "My House"  Ever Again.... . . After Divorce House Wise: End of the day I should have acted like a "normal person" instead of doing the whole "moral thing"... .

  . Quote from a well-meaning friend, : "...If you can never be loved is there any point in going on about it in a way that may make people sorry for you..." . BUT... ... - That is Not how passionate creativity works! I never choose the ideas! - It is instead, the ideas that choose me! You do the creative 'thang' you are inspired to do... Whether it is a sunset, a rainbow, grief, or the way a plastic bag blows in the wind. Creativity is not about being controlled, It is about being moved to create. It is a feeling... ...with a life of its own! ...Like a fire in the blood that needs to go somewhere! .

 . YOU SHOULD ONLY BE WITH SOMEONE WHO FEELS LUCKY TO HAVE YOU... . ...for me... ...it is never gonna happen... ...it has never happened.... for me.... ever.... ...even back when i was married no one ever said to my ex-wife,  "you are lucky to have ... him " ... it was always  "you are lucky to have Her! " (...even my own mother and family always said that to me, repeatedly) ...i have Never been valued that way... ...and now i realize that i Never, ever, will... . ...i now know.. ...for sure... ..i have finally learned... ...that i can never be loved... .

. WIP . The Empty Heart Fuel Tank. By Ross E F Lombardi . When you had lots of bad memories. . Then you meet someone. . Then together You build 30 years of some good memories. . Memories that gave you strength. . Then you get dumped. . All those good memories are now ruined and become sad memories. . Because it becomes obvious that none of those shared experiences meant anything to them. . And now you have no good memories anymore. . Where can you now get your strength from?!! . What's left? .

  . . My List TOP 5 As of 12/Oct/2024 . 1 the devil (small ‘d’ on purpose out of intentional disrespect) Because duh! He’s evil! . 2 me, myself and I, (small ‘m’ on purpose out of intentional disrespect) For being a failure and underachieving both professionally and ethically my entire life. . 3 god (small ‘g’ on purpose out of intentional disrespect) “Oi! god! – Get your fat lazy arse off your fucking golden throne and Actually Fucking Do something!” . 4 My genetic father (NOT my Dad Mr Lombrdi whom I love – but by my GENETIC father Mr E.M) Thanks for the lifetime of nightmares and mental illness… . 5 My Ex-Wife Because like an engine - Hate is empowering and motivates you, and anger gets shit done. - While crying is crippling, paralysing, disabling and demotivates you. . My List The TOP 5 sentient beings that I actively HATE most As of 12/Oct/2024 .

EEK! Re: My attempted George Micheal FAITH Parody Well, the number of hits in the first hour wise - It is a total flop! - <facepalm> I have rarely seen just low first-hour number hits! - OUCH! Even the TikTok is in the low 70s! And that usually hits nearly 200 in the first 40 mins! - So, in those terms, it has totally tanked! LOL! DAM! I am not too bothered, Everyone Is allowed the occasional stinker!

  RE: Frank Sinatra Vs Dean Martin: I always felt that Dean Martin “Dino,” had by far the truly superior singing voice out of the two. And in a similar vein - (When NOT singing comedy songs) - Bob Hope had a much better voice than Bing Crosby!