FAT By Ross E F Lombardi  . Some people are fat, Because they hate themselves. . Some people are thin, Because they hate themselves. . Some people take drink and drugs, Because they hate themselves. . Some people live a life of discipline and self-denial. Because they hate themselves. . Some people are cruel to others. Because they hate themselves. . Some people put up with too much of  other people's shit, Because they hate themselves. . Some people chase some form of success, Because they hate themselves, And have something to prove. . Some people give up. Because they hate themselves. And feel there is nothing more they can do. . Far too many people make excuses, Pretend and deny that they do not hate themselves. When in fact they do. . Far too many people admit the fact. And do all the usual self-destructive crap, That far too many of us do. . But good or bad. Right or wrong. Self-aware or deluded.

. . SALT WALL BURNING. By Ross E F Lombardi  WIP . On this wall. This wall of Salburn, Of This town of Salburn by the Sea. . On this wall. Where the woman who once loved me, Once waited, Once waited here for me. . In this damned wall, This wall of pain. This Salty Burn by an acidic memory Sea. . My imagination haunts me. As she now holds another man, Another man in her arms. A man who is not me. . My self-flagellating cruel mind will, Rip my heart and soul. Tears a tear from eye. A constant gut-repeated punch, That will not let be. . For I know. No one now, Will ever mourn, Or ever wait again, Wait again for me  .

. JUST GO! By Ross E F Lombardi . Life will tell you, Don't dance on an empty dance floor. Really? Just watch me! . Convention demands, You need to be in a group to go clubbing. Really? Just see me! . People will say, You cannot do or say that! Really? Then try and stop me! . Angry voices threaten. If we catch you doing shit, we'll batter you. I shrug, - Giggling. Then catch me! . Those kicking my ribs scream, Stay down you silly bugger! "Nah!" I whisper in sardonic glee  "I don't wanna" . I look in the mirror, And think no one will want this. Well, Prove me wrong and fuck me! . I, tell me, - That, I cannot be loved. So, Tenderly kiss me! . DO NOT - tell me who I am, - Ask me! . In a world that says, Know your place. I say, Fuck You! . Life, People and yourself will tell you lots of things  . Dare - double dare and - triple dare! . Dare to doubt IT! . Yourself, People, and Life will claim a lot of stuff, . Know This! . Almost all of it is Bullshit. .

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. DECLARATION OF WAR! My ex once told me. “You being fat is the biggest threat to our marriage”. She was right. Being fat is why she did not want to touch me. Being fat is why she is now fucking another man. If I am fat, THEN - I cannot be loved. I must become thin to be loved. Calories and Rest are my enemy. I don’t care about being healthy, I want to be loved. I will gain control. I will not let the universe win! I WILL gain the ability to be loved, I WILL get thin, Even if I sacrifice my health to do it! . Other people can be fat. But I am not allowed to be fat. It is only ok to be fat if you are normal AND charming. I can never be normal OR charming. But I can become thin. The world will only accept me if I am thin. .

  . Never fear the tyrant, the bully, the thug, or the serial killer. Never fear the Narcissist or the Sadist For all of these, are at heart, simple creatures. They only want to be feared, and respected, to have power, fame, and wealth. They are just evil humans. Instead, be terrified of the one who is willing to make the hard decisions that no one else is willing to. - including self-sacrifice of reputation, health, life, and honour, without any acknowledgement of their deeds. The ones that cannot be threatened or bribed or negotiated with The ones that care nothing for glory or medals or fame. The one willing to selflessly lose all friends and family and be seen as vile beyond compare, to protect the right secrets. Fear the ones that do not value their own good name! Be truly afraid of the good person who will at the cost of everything, Will always, "Do what is necessary”! "For the greater good" “At any and at all costs” Because THESE ar