. What My Genetic Father Taught Me (My genetic father Not my loving stepdad Mr Lombardi.) . My genetic father was the de facto head of his friend group, He was the Alpha Male of his circle. He was the one all the other local men looked up to and wanted to impress. He was loved by all the local women he met... He was feared and semi-worshipped by almost everyone! . - My genetic father taught me these things. - My genetic father taught me why any sensible woman would "choose bear" . He taught me what toxic masculinity was. He taught me rage and violence that has me STILL haunted by nightmares, despite me now being 50 years old. - He taught me all this as a toddler before I could possibly comprehend the horrible things I saw. My first ever memory is of him hitting my mum. - He is the reason that as a straight man - I struggled with self-loathing because I am a straight man. He taught me what monsters we men really are. - Because my frightened terrified toddler self at the bac