. If my ex texted me? "I'm sure you still think about me every night" I would reply, - Yeah, I do - You dumbed me after 30 years - (shrug) so, of course I do - But NOT in a good way... ... ...each night before bed, like a prayer to something dark inside of me, I repeat "I hate, Susan", "I hate Susan", "I hate Susan", three times. - Then I repeat the same every morning, again three times. . I would never do anything to harm her BUT I would ALSO Never do anything to help her! Whether it is a heart attack in the park Or Attempted kidnap and assault on the street, My phone stays in my pocket and I just keep walking. I refuse to help her - Ever! . I fantasise and dream of getting an opportunity of NOT helping her - When she most desperately needs it! ‘Malicious Callousness’ Is all she will ever get from me now. She wanted a world without me – so, that exactly is what she now gets! A world without me in it to ever aid her! I will NEVER help her!...