. A ROSS SHOUT OUT! . Hi any and all, I'm kinda feeling super defeated at the moment. I know it's not your problem. But if you know of any art or writing leads, opportunities, or similar stuff, please consider throwing me a bone. I am VERY cheap. There is NO writer or artist at a similar skill level anywhere near as cheap as I am. ! I will ruthlessly undercut anybody. ! Cheers. . Rat Lombot social media links so you can keep up with what I am doing. . FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100092840913639 . TWITTER OR X: https://twitter.com/RossLombardi1 . Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ratlombot/ . Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/ratlombot2 . You Tube: https://www.youtube.com/@Rat_Lombot/featured . Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rat_lombot . Vocal Media: https://vocal.media/authors/ross-e-fortune-lombardi . Medium: https://medium.com/@ratlombot . Blogger: https://www.lombot.co.uk/ . Does anyone want to go cheaper! :) Well for jokes, wedding toast etc...

? THEM: "I’m an 20 year old trapped in a 50 odd year old body!" "How did that happen!" . MY ADVICE: "- I got you! I have this problem all the time. A ) Do not be embarrassed to call an ambulance. B ) Tell the poor 50-year-old lass not to panic and for her try to relax. C ) Keep adding more lube and try a shoehorn, But be gentle. D ) Once solved Maybe do the socially responsible thing to stop this happening again! Consider a surgical solution. Get penis size reduction surgery!! -" . . Dear whole of the entire too easily offended internet: THIS IS JUST A STUPID VERY SILLY JOKE! Take it as such and move on with your life!! !

 . . i have done been part of suffered fought and somehow still survived.      some incredible things      some unbelievable things      true stories that I never repeat because no one will believe them. it would just taste like delusional, fantasist, ‘Walter Mitty’ ,   macho bullshit.      cinematic stuff out of a blockbuster movie.           And yet           As an over 50-year-old,           Apparently           NOW… If I stretch “slightly wrong” I throw my neck out.           And can barely move for three days Growing Old SUCKS! .

  UK Politics and UK Banking get together for a pint . UK Politics: “Dude,” - “I have had it with this Palestine Action” - “We would try to prosecute them for criminal damage” “But we don’t think we’d get the conviction we want” . UK Banking: “Dude!” - “That Sucks” . UK Politics: “My - ‘Mr Daddy Weapons Dealer’ - is getting pissed off at me” “They are getting nervus about their investment” - “But it’s not my fault” . UK Banking: “My Dude!” - “Sorry to hear that bro!” - “Can’t you get them on some sort of technicality?” . UK Politics: “I Dunno Bro,” - “People are not a stupid as they used to be” - “Why?” - “What did you have in mind?” . UK Banking: “Just bend things a little” - “Remember how we made that cool Fractional Reserve Lending thang” “That thang, that was just supposed to allow for a bit of flexibility to keep cash flow up” . UK Politics: “Yeh, Sorta? Ish?” . UK Banking: “And then over time we bent it a bit” “We bent i...

ALL THIS. By Ross E F Lombardi. . To Kill a silent mocking word. To allow a scream to die To not allow a whisper to be heard To promote and brag the lie. . To disallow dissent to be stirred. To disallow the journalist to pry. To slaughter the singing pretty bird. To forbid the child to cry . No spirit may look skyward. No one may stand too tall. You MUST conform to the mewing herd. ALL THIS to control us All. .

  Date  05/07/2025   UK Time 13:32  …---…  My mental illness is totally kicking my arse at the moment,  The internal dialogue is extra cruel today.  …---…  The world is full of people in pain,  And I am helpless to help any of them.  …---…

. Them: "So we want you to do 15 minuites of materail" "Poems and stuff" . Me: "EASY!" "I have hundreads, maybe even thousands of options" . Them: "And it has to all be family freindly" . Me: ".....Errrrr??" "By family freindly...?" . Them: "No!" "We do not mean the Charles Manson 'family' cult" . Me: "Ok" . Them: "No!" "Not the House of Borgia of the Italian Renaissance, either" . Me; "... ok I just...." . Them: "The sort of family that might have a big bright balloon with them!" "Who offers to do nice things for strangers" "Who likes clowns and stuff" "Yeh know" "Something that will be attractive to people and draw them in" . Me: "No problem!" "Thats easy" <I smile happily, suddenly confident and cheerful> . Them: <Thinking for a bit, gettng worried - then turning back t...

  "I Need Brains!" - Why Can't I Just Stay Down If I Want? By Ross E F Lombardi ...---… Sometimes, Many times, More frequently lately. I'm thinking. "Why do I have to keep trying?" "Why can't I just be a 'shut in' if I want?" "Why should I try to join the world?" ...---… It's easy for others to criticise me for giving up on myself, ...---… But I’ve been fighting this shit for decades! ...---… Everything is so heavy. All the dam time. And I want to quit so badly. I AM spiritually TIRED!! I don't want to be brave anymore. I want to stop fighting for 'a life'. I don't want to get back up. I want to just 'stay down' on the mat. Let life win. Let life get the 'Knock Out.' ...---… And now Sometimes, Many times, Quite a bit More frequently lately... When I ask myself Why I should 'get up' again. - Go out again, Before that ...

. Them: "So we want you to do 15 minuites of materail" "Poems and stuff" . Me: "EASY!" "I have hundreads, maybe even thousands of options" . Them: "And it has to all be family freindly" . Me: ".....Errrrr??" "By family freindly...?" . Them: "No!" "We do not mean the Charles Manson 'family' cult" . Me: "Ok" . Them: "No!" "Not the House of Borgia of the Italian Renaissance, either" . Me: "... ok I just...." . Them: "The sort of family that might have a big bright balloon with them!" "Who offers to do nice things for strangers" "Who likes clowns and stuff" "Yeh know" "Something that will be attractive to people and draw them in" . Me: "No problem!" "Thats easy" <I smile happily, suddenly confident and cheerful> . Them: <Thinking for a bit, gettng worried - then turning back t...

  . UNDERTSTANDING HOW CRUSHES WORK! By Ross E F Lombardi . FUCKING CRUSHES! They are not magical They are not mystical They are just the brain being lazy. There is a reason most people have ‘a type’ . . TRY THIS! Make a list of all the similarities good and bad between your present crush and the all the last emotionally charged relationships you ever had. It does not matter whether the relationship was good or bad, only that is was emotionally charged, In fact, past toxic relationships get double points when you make you similarity with your present crush list! Dull or less emotionally powerful experience barely count at all! - IF at all! – Even if those experience are good positive ones! The brain is lazy and the whole human body is designed to reduce any resource use. . When you have a series of strong emotional experiences, especially the bad ones, it creates mental pathways, not unlike Pavlov dog conditioning. Carving these hormone trenches is a he...

? "Is it just me?" "Or is the weather a tad on the warm side at the moment?"

  It’s a weird coincidence! No reason to look to hard at it. - Only a coincidence. By Ross E F Lombardi . You know what’s a weird coincidence? One that almost no one seems too ever notice. An amazing one? That coincidence is SO common, that its strangeness is totally imperceptible by your average human. But can easily be perceived by lesser beings, such as myself and most dogs? . The coincidence that it always seems to be the VERY SAME people that say any variant or combination of any of the following… “You have to learn to love yourself first” AND “Being independent is self-empowering” AND “You should never be solely responsible for another individuals happiness” OR “You should never need someone else to make you happy,” AND “You just need to surround yourself with positive people” And of course, the ever immortal, “Your fine,” “Don’t worry about it” . Are the Very SAME PEOPLE, That have a supportive network, of friends and/or ...

...---... Well... I Could, thoretically, "get help"... OR?... ...---... And hear me out first on this one... ...---... ? OR? I can, INSTEAD of getting help - Choose to slide down the mental health plughole, until I eventually hit the right "stresser", snap like a dry twig, then hurt a load of inocent people before the police are forced to kill me - to protect the public... ? ...Just saying It still seems a littile bit premature to start taking any options off the table... ...---... ! Note: I am a Satirist! – NOT a ‘basic bitch’ comedy writer! My jokes are SUPOSSED to make you worry and feel a little uncomfortable After you give a brief guilt-ridden giggle... !

The night out on you own, Ross Lombardi drinking game. . Drinking RULES. . 1 If the music is crap - Take A Drink ...at the start of every verse. . 2 If you feel lonely - Take A Drink . 3 If you wish you had some cool conversation - Take A Drink . 4 If you wish you were home instead. - Take A Drink . 5 If you think a pretty woman is making eyes at you. Down In One - Get Off You Arse - Play It Cool - Cross the Room - ... Then... ... Leave ...Immediately go to a different pub, so you don't act like a yet another typical drunk arshole, spoiling some poor lass's night with your delusional male bullsit. Then at the new location. - Take A Shot.

. While it is true, that when in a relationship, I am untouchable, and totaly loyal. That is not an enough ethical enough justigfication to "date".   . All reashionships are like a ledger. My black ledger loyalty and commitment to a woman is NOT worth all the rest of the red ledger baggage that Comes with it. . The only moraly correct action for me to take is to push anyone that may be interested away. I am too damaged. I am broken goods. . I am just on the edge of being able to finally accept my destiny and fate. . I am not meant to be saved. I am meant to help others. As a kind of none-religious monk. I need to come to terms that the "romantic love" phase of my life is over, And make life about other people and various social justice causes instead.  . The only obstical to that higher purpose is my own sex drive. I hate my own high sex drive. And I want to get rid of it completely. I am thinking. No sex drive = Far less problems. . I’d like to become a being of pu...

Personal plea: Don't judge my writing if you don't read all of it to the end. I like using misleading titles, misdirection, and changing subjects and viewpoints near the end. I like to twist and turn the context to give surprise endings and good ironic or sarcastic end lines. I love Dr Jonathan Swift 'a modest proposal' tone, Satire and writing as someone who is not really me to make a larger point. If you hadn't read all of it to the end = then you have not read the piece at all! . When in doubt, Ask me what I actually think and believe! . Cheers. Signed Ross E F Lombardi RatLombot@Gmail.Com .

 ! Mark the day this was posted!  The date stamp on this post. Trump is currently bragging.... ! 21 days All the bragging and "stuff" now will mean nothing within 21 days. 15th August 2025 This is not 'psychic powers' or "magic" or "prophecy" This is pattern recognition. . Grab your ankles. Grit your teeth! Brace for the vile storm! .